Do you think red sox nation has an official powerpoint template/memo format for resignations of manny support, bandwagon applications, and other official business?
I learned much from the teen babysitter: I can light a cigarette in a microwave.
I have a drinking game planned. Were gunna watch empire records. Everytime they say rex manning we have to take a shot
you kept running around the room with a flask shouting "so much room for activities!" then someone tripped you and you passed out
this is hardly the first time i've been told i'm dressed "too suggestively" for 7 in the morning.
In my defense it was my birthday and I really wanted to do it.
who knew that a girl that let me piss on her within 20 minutes of meeting her would get upset i couldn't remember her name.
It's been 5 months since I last wore a condom.
Not including when spray tanning
We're playing fucking games. GAMES. THIS IS BULL SHIT. IM GOING TO THROW UP ON THE BABIES AND LEAVE.
Logically he should not be walking around...after that fall he should be in a hospital in a medically induced coma
I'm Michael Phelps, Olympic Champion.
Are you just smoking weed? Cause that's not actually a Michael Phelps costume
We just got in a fight with grandma b/c she tried to tell us you didn't go hard.
There aren't enough words in the English language to fully describe how worried I am for your dick. And the rest of you, I suppose.
Shes yelled my World of Warcraft name when we were having sex, I think marriage is next.
This girl in my class is lecturing my professor about zombies. It has been going on for 15 minutes.
Zombies?
Zombies.
Randomize
