I only have two rules. But i've fotgotten those rules and replaced them w 2 other rules
Something clean will definitely be barfed on tomorrow.
I am coming home for anal
* a nap*
The best part was her genuine shock and total "I didn't know" look when we said she couldn't cook a steak in a microwave.
ONE NIGHT STAND. You have 27 minutes before the offer expires, so I suggest you hurry.
i will see naked twins by the end of the night. that's all i know
To this day, he introduces me as "the girl I met climbing trees at 3 A.M."
Good news! I don't have Hep C! Better news! I still hate you!
And then we were riding the keg in the pool like an 8 second rodeo...naked.
I should have bailed a long time ago. I mean, he has a bible verse-a-day app next to his dick pics in his phone.
is one penis in the hand worth one better nicer penis in the manscaped bush?
if the furniture in my bedroom wasn't shape shifting... this would be a different story.
Reasonably certain my seventh grade teacher is encouraging me to drop acid on twitter
My phone just said I texted someone at 430a and said let's fight. Then I texted them an hour later and said thanks.
Please don't think I'm weird for texting you this at 12:08 am but I just found another picture on the Internet where I think you can see his dick through whatever he's wearing
Randomize
