can "i'm close!" be our safe word(s)?
oh geez, wrong person.
you kept telling everyone that you were the mayor of silverware town
Random question, how's your gag reflex these days
right as i was about to introduce them she goes "old fuck buddy, meet new fuck buddy."
I just decorated my birth control case with Lisa Frank stickers. If that doesn't scream 'I'm not ready for babies' I don't know what does.
...and all my boxers are outside in the snow because????
i drank out of a bidet.
he's dressed up as pikachu 3 fucking years in a row and gotten laid each time. i don't understand
Nah its cool some of my cousins have fucked the same girls and brought them on family vacations and everything.
He stumbled in drunk at 7am, while we were getting ready for work. He poured a bowl of Cap'n Crunch, poured Jack Daniels on it., and said he was having "Captain Jack" for breakfast. I don't know how he's alive and employed. I hope the Cap'n calls in sick for him today.
what i'd really like is a nice helping of naked boyfriend with a side of naked boyfriend.
I AM NOT LOSING TO SOME FICTIONAL CROSSDRESSER
He told me that after two hours of fucking he feels as though his dick wants to detach from his body and go to Mexico..
Why did my mother make you get naked?
We hotboxed his bathroom. going to be a good night
Hotbox went wrong - smoke sets off fire alarm. Firefighters coming
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