She offered to make me a fruit roll up salad for breakfast...I'm not sure if that's the coolest or weirdest thing ever...
I actually want to hang out with her with our clothes on. That's a big step up for me.
Okay, just a casual question: how did i manage to get grass stains on the inside of my bra?
The liquor store was handing out free shots of some new expensive vodka, but they caught on the fourth time we came back in different outfits. Politics.
OHMYGOD did I try to use pinesol as a mixer?
I remember desperately screaming that I love my life and running in zig zags all the way home
I think it's starting to become crucial that I find a companion for my vagina.
Trying to do the walk of shame over here WHY are there a hundred ppl on the el?! Thank god I pulled a summit and wore casual clothes I even stopped by the farmers market and bought some squash
I had mdma, weed, and alcohol in my system. My doctor seems to think that's how I tore my groin.
I feel like if he almost got me pregnant once, i can at least say hi in a bar
my roommate would be appalled if she knew how many times i've peed in the kitchen sink
Thanks for having me over last night. Sorry I licked rum off your kitchen floor.
Naked. Naked is my favorite color.
He shit with the door open. I think that means we are in a realtionship.
I admit I fucked your best friend, but to be fair, you fucked the tristate area. So there's a good chance about 40% of those people are MY friends.
Randomize
