Bad news: I had to be at work at 7:15. Good news: no one had used the bathroom yet so I got to defile a freshly cleaned stall
"Tonight I'm turning swine flu into an std" this might be how zombies come about. Peace civilization.
So, I just sold my textbook to have money for Plan B.
Her name is Sherri and her sister's are Brandy and Champagne. Of course I want to meet her parents.
Everytime I see a couple on campus walking and holding hands I just want to yell he's gonna lie!
it was like that last scene in "It's A Wonderful Life" but with alcohol
they're both coked to the gills having a shouting match about the powers and abilities of godzilla. and using the wikipedia entry on the topic to support their respective arguments.
From the same High Brittany who brought you such thoughts as, "Fuck, am I wearing shoes?" Comes High Brittany on a date! Stay tuned. This will be interesting.
Would you mind pretending to be lesbians just for like three emails?
Why would I take you home? That would eliminate the chances of you making bad decisions I could ridicule you about later.
I am disappointed by everyone's lack of ability to dance on a stripper pole:(
Should I get the rainbow boxer breifs???
As your boyfriend, this is a level of gay that even I can't handle.
You're about wine.
Yes, I'm like 90% wine at the moment
Would it be rude to use my vibrator? like he forfeited his right to be mad when he left me orgasmless...right?
I smell like heartbreak.
Tequila and sloppy rebound sex?
How did you know?
Randomize
