Btw I've read that book you bought me...And I'm such a bitch now
But I don't think guys love me
I heard you threw up in your lap?
I heard that too.
i blame lastnights decisions on friday the 13th
Angelique from Rock of Love is now doing phone sex commercials for central illinois....id say she's going places.
Two hours into move in day and the ambulance is here already.
Woke up with string cheese braided into my hair- literally braided
You convinced me that eggnog and rum is a great moisturizer.
Dude sorry but it totally wasn't worth going back in there for yous shoes
She suggested that I come visit her in Europe and hook up with the heteroflexible Korean who sits next to her in class. Polylove is the best love.
P.s. remind me to tell you about the porno that Paul envisioned starring you. It's wizard of oz themed.
Things in my bed this morning: a Waffle House hat, a finding nemo DVD, sharpies, my graduation robes and an adult diaper. Did we play drunk scavenger hunt again?
The guy who's car I hit last night just followed me on Twitter...not sure how to feel about it.
Oh I see how it is...you can snap chat the world your balls but I wear dinosaur feetie pajamas and I'm the "weird one"
Awesome. I did a rain go away dance. And it went away. Nbd just cotrollin the weather with my mind and sweet dance moves
I figured it out! There's blood on the kitchen floor because I fell into the dishwasher. And there's a face dent. And it doesn't work.
Yea.....I saw that happen.
Randomize
