I can't ever handle being "that girl" again. At least not until next semester.
We stopped her at 12
12 shots? Or 12 midnight?
Which answer would freak you out less
The frequency that you give me blue balls couldn't be healthy.
It's amazing how many friends she makes simply by carrying that flask of whiskey everywhere she goes.
It was sunday, you had a camel back of bloody mary stumbling around a dog park with no dog.
WHY DO YOU ALWAYS PUT THE PLUG IN THE SINK BEFORE YOU PUKE IN IT
Did i tell you that he's legal and i got his number? Because he's legal and i got his number. THIS BITCH AIN'T GOING TO JAIL YET
Also, there's the possibility of falling 5 feet to your death to make it more exciting
In which case I will yell FIVE SECOND RULE and continue to slam you
There is nothing worse then the feeling after you've held in farts all night..
What's his name?
i just thought a plastic bag was my cat. i just pet a plastic bag. that high.
If you ever "miss" working, I'm going to fist you with my hulk hands. BOTH of them.
It's still fucked up that my mom let me think Vanilla Ice was my dad for YEARS just because she thought it was funny.
i mean ive seen your left buttcheek how much more bro can this get
reminiscing on last night: why the fuck did I feel the need to stand on chairs everytime we took a jello shot?
For the love of all that is holy just take the tranquilizers Erica
Randomize
