Crown is evil. It plays hide and seek with my morals
I don't apprectiate you insinuating that my breasts have a sort of bremuda triangle effect
it's just like freshman year of high school, with more drugs
shut up. I wear heels bigger than your dick
Just because your phone has a case on it doesn't mean it will survive a 5 story drop out the window.
Only in this snowstorm did have I realized the lengths I'll go to to get laid.
I dare you try and top an Eiffel tower full of Margarita
$5 off purchases of eighths or more today only. Happy tax-free weekend. -Your consumer-minded pot dealer
I'm in a pile of cheezits at an unfamiliar location watching dateline on tlc. Stage an intervention.
Don't forget: you only show your tits for the good beads. Be judicious.
I just can't promise there won't be a reason to hit you in the face with a dildo again in the future.
Part of my treatment is getting high and having sex with 22 year olds. I have a prescription!
In case you were wondering, yes I did just watch the Katy Perry movie alone on a Saturday night. I'm so alone it makes a noise.
Actually going to jail after your wedding is NOT part of the plan.
So anyway, I'm just floating along life with my vibrator and low expectations.
Randomize
