last night i got mauled by 2 gay men who were trying to make each other jealous by making the other think they could swing back- you're going to love atl
im pretty sure there are laws against slapping prostitutes
i'm pretty sure there are laws against prostitutes.
So i just found out i replied to my room mates craigslist ad. Akward
I'm beginning to feel kind of at home at Police stations
What's the point of having 3 fuck buddies when their periods all seem to sync up
Based on the pics I have taken of hookups while they were passed out or sleeping, I have scientifically concluded that no two vagina lips are the same. They are like snowflakes.
Ryab! Make hr wtop. Mshe make sme speee. I don want to pee. I want sev. He was so igbad. Redpo.
Every girl my sister has brought home from college I've had sex with, check and mate motherfucker
I'm pretty sure I just need an IV drip of Plan B at this point...
Like please, take your microdick and try to stick it someplace else. It is not welcome in my world.
I'm just going to have crazy good sex with him until one of us developed feelings that works in the movies right?
Why the HOLY HELL is my dog on my roof??? Sam?? Why is the dog wearing my pants
I'm currently in h&m wondering "what exactly is the class level of a swingers resort?"
The next time you invite me out to a bar full of cougars warn me first. I never felt like a piece of meat before.
Hey. Did I get punched in the face last night?
Yeah. I told you I would and you didn't believe me.
Randomize
