I've decided to sign up for a porn membership, but it's 10:30 and I'm going to wait an hour an a half because I don't want to waste a whole day of my month long membership. Fuck this economy.
She was walking with the authority that 2 beers gave to a light weight.
at john mayer concert. alone. to many highschool kids. i feel like a drunk chaperone with a pomegranite martini mustache
I hope so. I just start to question my lifestyle when i pee on coffee tables
All i know is we had 4 people on a tandum bike, and told the cops we couldnt stop because our momentum was so good.
do we own a ladder
We do not.
then how am i on the roof
I'm glad that even though we are states apart our whorish hearts beat as one
Hows the party lookin?
At a live sex show right now. Not sure about the employee party
there was 'chicken suit porn' in my search history.......also 'scuba diving porn'
I don't think the TSA would be too happy. Who knows if three ounces of lube will be enough for us?
I can't tell if I'm still on the hangover from last night, or if I'm experiencing the one from tomorrow, because it was so powerful that it actually traveled back through time...
So none of you told me my tits were popping out of my shirt for three hours?
We told you. Repeatedly. You said you made it look good.
I gave him head while despicable me 2 played in the background. I think I disappointed the minions
He finished and he wasn't even totally hard. He actually came without a boner.
HOW IS THAT EVEN POSSIBLE.
Masturbated while waiting for my face mask to dry, so it was a productive night.
Randomize