Did you see 7 ppl got hurt at Talladaga?
Did they get their mullets stuck in an engine?
the #6 from wendy's when stoned is definitely better than sex. i dont care what anyone says.
apparently breaking a beer bottle and then throwing up in a urinal is a terrible way to pick up girls.
it's like heaven, but drunker
She put up a picture of her grandmother on facebook, looks like the lazy eye runs in the family
... They left for 10 minutes and came back with a lobster he's in the toilet downstairs
Breakfast Clubbing as Juggalos. I can feel our IQs in freefall.
Well he fell three stories from the balcony and still had the strength to fuck me for 2 hours.
He gave me a beer, petted my head, and called me kiddo.
Do you think I could get someone from tinder to drive me to the airport?
my vag sweat smells like doritos
so now that we're not dating you have to stop sending shit like this to me okay?
Two things. 1) party at my house this Friday 2) what was the name of the Australian you fucked on the cruise ship?
My cat just tried to lay on my stomach while I was masturbating. And I let her because I am so starved for affection.
You know the sex was rough when you wake up with a chipped tooth. I have no regrets
Of course his biggest mistake was assuming that I ever gave a fuck to begin with.
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