Is it really that bad? I heard it was like pooping. I like pooping.
I'm blazed at jack in the box and my order number is 420. I wish everything in the world made this much sense.
I am drunk as shit eating pancakes. I am not the person to call.
he told me he wanted to get "words" tattooed on his penis so he could say hes always putting words in my mouth..
I only have two playlists on my iPod. One for when im getting drunk, one for when I'm getting high. Is this something to be worried about?
He just said he was the Jesus of alcoholics.
Is it sad I don't want to go buy $1 Mac-n-cheese cause I need to pay rent... I'm re-naming this college.
Also, peanut butter on a spoon dinner is back in existence and it is good.
OK am i seriously the only one who thinks Cocaine Tuesdays is a bad idea?
The money is just too good to quit doing it. I'm using the same justification strippers use.
It was insane. I was drunk for 11 consecutive hours. I woke up covered in almonds and there were footprints all over my shirt
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
Yeah. I don't know. I'm just gonna show up at her place on valentines day with a jock strap, box of chocolates, and rose clenched between my ass cheeks with "be mine" written across my glorious man titties.
Also I’m on 3%. Just Incase.. I miss you and I love you and you’re my everything and I’m getting drunk.
I’m going to have to rewatch all of them. Drugs, man.
Ewe he just snapped me a pic of his butt crack.. Should I be concerned?
Randomize
