I pooped in a mop bucket.
WTF???
Their employee restroom was locked what kind of customer service is that
So I pulled my t-shirt down, pushed my boobs up and marched right into that church!
everytime someone famous vagina shows up in pics, i have to go check my own vagina to make sure mine dont look all wrinkledy and flabby like that....i want my lips plump and succulent
No I remember falling down the stairs I just don't remember it hurting.
This can't be good. I've realized that I weigh less in the morning after I have had a blackout drunk night than when I work out and eat healthy.
We could make it a date. Dinner and a show. The show being my nipples getting pierced.
Despite fighting the urge to vomit throughout the whole thing, I think that interview went really well!
Makes Sense, i generally dont want the same person two days in a row. Its like what i pick for supper, i like variety
Bone him for me, BONE HIM TWICE FOR ME.
yeah, never be friends with someone with shitty eyebrows.. they obviously already make poor life choices
You rolled onto your side and told me 'this is the recovery position'. That was after you were stoned. You've done this way too much.
I'm the Oprah of jello shots
but I truly enjoy making out with my best friend more than my boyfriend
Wine and a Lunchable. That would be depressing if it wasn't the pepperoni and mozzarella one. Those are the shit!
Coffee's working. Just killed a fly with my bare hands.\nFuck with me.
Randomize
