Doo rag and shades in the bar. You are missing your future husband.
Just woke up naked in my storage cubby and some one rearragned my whole room?
no jk, not my room
My grandpa is talking about laundry and he asked if i could run a "small hot load." Wow. I had to leave the room.
He looks too sensitive, like he's going to write me a poem and cry after the first time we have sex.
If I were a hot girl. I'd whore around, I'd be awesome.
I'm pretty sure he came before I knew he was inside me.. Didn't think that was his plan when he said he was gonna do things I've never experienced before
hey, when you wake up, search yourself on youtube
my sister already found it, were watching it right now. i give it 2 thumbs up.
he was shitfaced drunk and couldn't walk but could still recite the top 10 in order from the first season of american idol. impressive
We are probably going to have to use your boobs as currency to get this done
Passing out on a toilet is not classy no matter what you're wearing. Not even a pea coat.
Remember that time you bought snap bracelets on Amazon and they sent you 300 pregnancy tests instead? Amazon knows.
The Winnie the Pooh costume was great until you got drunk and started yelling at the kids asking for pictures.
The bottle of Jameson may have been a bit aggressive for a Sunday cookout.
I'm too high and old for this...
She was all for the threesome til I showed her a pic of my boyfriend. I think I should re-evaluate my life decisions.
Randomize
