I did that thing where I cum for no reason again.
The problem is he wears abercrombie jeans like there's nothing wrong with it
Oh so it was one of those "I shouldn't have gotten in a cab with a random 21 year old girl" kinda nights.
I do. There's a bald headed guy whose kinda hot. I might rub his head. I've only had 2 beers
I'm considering failing out of my last semester of college just so I can keep fucking him.
...then she kept trying to make balloon animals with my flacid penis. I'm never drinking whisky with you again.
And then he posed under the bed and said, "you should draw me like one of your french girls." Why do they keep giving this kid drugs?
Every time I there's a break up, I'm left with an animal. That's it. No more mutual pets.
i introduced myself to everyone by my new name, thundergooch. i threatened the neighbors with a hammer when they used my real name. needless to say, sailor jerry was not kind to me.
Want to come over and play therapist and then fuck all the emotion away?
You better be Eskimo Brother-ing the FUCK out of tonight right now. Long distance 'balls deep' high five
Just a warning... Flip, sip, or strip always ends in all participants being naked. Learning from experience.
We just got busted fucking in the hammock by his roommate...I'm so out of here as soon as hes asleep....
The Vicodin is in the strawberries.
I thought you couldn't go near Germans after that restraining order
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