My e-date is really photogenic. Real-life not so much
the night i cant remember will be the night i always remember thanks to my "i
Lonely and bored. Am I allowed to play Dance Dance Revolution by myself?
Time to put an end to this 'unprotected sex with crazy girls who have violent exes' trip I've been on so far this summer
I had to fart so bad so i let it go hoping it would be quiet, it was loud and shit came out!!! and i couldnt leave because her parents were behind me
Someone left a beer in front of your door...there's a note with it that says "peace offering"
I always have trouble explaining my life decisions to people over the age of 30.
Last time I get high to write a paper the night before it's due. "Tiny Wings and sexuality" is not an acceptable topic to for a paper. Class in 30 minutes. I'm fucked...
Yeah but then he looked at me bleeding on the floor, said oh i guess you need to go to the hospital now, and left
She clicked her fingers, said "here boy!", and pointed at her vagina.
I was grinding on him when mosquitoes starting biting us and ruined every damn thing. I just wanted to fuck on a slide under the stars. It's every girls dream.
I know you've been in hospital with meningitis, but last night I walked into a streetlight and bruised my penis so who's really suffering here
Currently on my Sunday walk of shame. Should I go to church?
holy shit the yoga instructor bought his baby pig to class today
It's difficult to focus on bonds when you know your classmate peed in your mouth
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