I love watching others lives come down to our level.
I was surprised he admitted he couldnt keep up. We both knew but usually they dont come out and say it
going to a night class in lingerie so i can quickly go to his house after.
I miss your penis. I'm telling you this as a friend, like its just a really great penis. You should be proud of it.
He is making me drink his THC water out of a milk jug.
At some point during thanksgiving the image of me pooping on ur moms chest will come to you. Your welcome!
I got kicked out of the hotel after wandering into the banquet kitchen at 2am trying to find the shrimp....so we're power napping in the car and then driving to madison.
He told me the hickey on the side if his neck was actually a "bruise" from hitting a bird on his motorcycle. I'm not sure what's more impressive, the fact people believed him due to the size of the mark or the fact you gave it to him.
I dressed up as a "typical white girl" which meant I wore my yoga pants and uggs all night. BEST. IDEA. EVER. Most comfy halloween everrrr.
I will show up on your front porch in a wet t shirt and some mac and cheese
I need vitamin water and Jesus :/
He said I taste like cake. Like funfetti. So I feel like if he doesn't come back for that he's just dumb
I think I'd rather see her get hit by a car in one of those Russian dash cam videos on YouTube.
While strippers were eating ones out of my boobs, several sources claimed trump shared classified info with the russians. We should get hammered on Mondays more often, bitch.
I’m photoshopping my boobs to up my Tinder game. I need better dick in 2020
Randomize
