this is amy. the small petlike person from the womens bathroom at the reef.
slowly transforming into a stationary lump of steel. how can you tell me that was JUST weed
Also, I've sobered up around 5am, in Delaware. I remember making this decision, and highly regret it now.
You told me when we were leaving the club if I could pin point your nipple through your padded bra you would show me if I was right.
Just interrupted a freshman tour to ask where the sexual health center is. Figured I'd just give us all what we were really looking for.
girl I've been sleeping with this summer as per her request just gave me a carton of cigs to thank me for my "hospitality". this is good.
Oh we will ALWAYS be together. Or I'll have to delete my Facebook altogether. I've drunkenly boobie trapped photos of us into every album. There's no way I'd ever have the patience to go through that deletion process.
wanna tell me why theres a glass of water stuffed with tamptons in the freezer?
Too much alcohol and too many lesbians. I can officially say I have regrets now. At least that's something.
Woke up in the middle of my kitchen clutching a cheesy gordita crunch
I would agree. Whose business is it if I like to guzzle vodka by the liter on my of time? Answer: mine.
Don't forget to make sex 3rd on your calander
You shouldn't play strip poker when you're having a wet fart kind of day.
Can we just take a minute to acknowledge that you're drinking with your gay ex boyfriend's DAD who is a DEACON??
He’s definitely circumcised. There’s not enough room in those speedos for a foreskin with that fire hose he’s packing.
Randomize
