Text. Mid BJ. 8 points.
did you ever find your cell phone? and your dignity?
would it be inappropriate to describe you with the phrase "bigass titties"?
Woke up wearing just a scarf, the holidays are definetly here
Its mothers day and I have choke marks around my neck. Thanks for that.
drunk taco night MLK would want it this way.
the taxi driver actually pulled over to let us moon a house full of people
Ask her if said friend is decent looking or a wildabeast. Need to know if I need to top these 8 coronas off with a little tequila.
If we go out with the 22/23 year olds we should make t a double date. I don't want to endure the judging looks of the public as I rob the cradle alone.
I threw up in a Buffalo Wild Wings and then got a high-five. I really don't understand America
You also hate cartoons and musicals, so I will take that to mean the movie was as awesome as I thought it was..smoke weed
What, I can't laugh at my sister being driven crazy by Facebook randomly assigning chat significance to the guy she lost her virginity to?
I have two bottles of emergency tequila stashed under my desk at work.
Dude, exfoliate your balls. you'll thank me later.
Her hand jobs are magic. They smell like vanilla and awesomeness. She made me forget how to walk
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