i just posted a lake picture of you with a dead fish in your mouth. happy july 5th.
I cant believe Lindsay Lohan feels like this every day
Ive waited a long time for a girl with prescriptions like yours.
That feeling when you're ready to convert to the religion of whatever god will stop the vomit. Dynamite is illegal.
he's singing something in russian and knocking over my plants with his dick, get his drunk ass out of my apartment
HE STUCK IT IN THE FISHBOWL WTF
This question may sound intrusive, but how did pushing out a baby affect your vagina?
I'm jealous that you can use my boobs as pillows & I can't.
do you think me going to the gyno dressed as a cat is inappropriate?
I am laying in your bed and just found a bottle of wine under your pillow ...should have married you...
He called me in the middle of the night to ask my shoe size. Apparently big feet would make me an unsatisfactory third for the threesome.
Actually, lets be honest. I will probably keep calling him the pastor because it brings me joy using pastor and fuck buddy in the same sentence.
If you could get me there thatd be perfect. I doubt there's extradition on the moon.
I hope Trump leaves Planned Parenthood alone for at least another month. The week got away from me. #whorelando
RUDE you're the one missing half a nipple...
IT HEALED AND GREW BACK TO BE A FULL HEALTHY NIPPLE OKAY
Well this guy just went into a detailed lecture about how rinos are developing into unicorns.. It's gonna be a good night.
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