I thought she would fill the void you created. Turns out she thought I just wanted to fill hers.
Glad I put on jeans. You could measure my ass sweat with a rain guage.
After 10 years all I have gotten is one bra pic, at this point I should be able to draw your cervix from memory
doing a bong hit while wearing crest white strips...not such a great idea...
can your parents tell?
i just had a cookie in one hand and a phone in the other and tried to eat my phone...they know
they are using this drunk girl like a spin the bottle in the hot tub, whoever she lands on she makes out with.
There's always the 'not have sex with the drunk girl I just met at some party' option.
That was the plan but Tequila showed up at the party too.
Ladystoner tip: if eyes are bloodshot, lime green eyeliner makes them appear less red. its basic artt.
I wonder what acid is like for a blind person... Can we find this out?
Dude, I brought the fucking tequila to that party and they cheered for the chick that seriously only brought limes.
Uhm after 8 I don't recall anything. All I know is there's a picture of me playing pong with my grandmother.
I think if my mom ever finds out about my nipple piercings I'll just be like "mom, tbh it's a sex thing"
250 people in this lecture & my prof asks who already drank green beer this morning& is drunk right now. I WAS THE ONLY ONE TO RAISE MY HAND
I'm still questioning who dropped me off last night. So successful wedding?
So, were you planning on telling me you left your panties in my glovebox??
Randomize
