Lets evaluate? U kissed one boss and lef twith another man. I cock teased the other, hardcore had a tongue jammed down my throat, made out w aa third then left in a cab w alex w them all yelling at me and offering rides. My cheek was also licked and bitten by 2 other men and we almost made out (u and me) because they asked. were hired.
Its not like he dircectly choose a cheeseburger over sex, it was more like I said seductively "I really appreciate this and I'm going to make it up to you anyway I can" and he replied "i want a bacon cheeseburger"
i guess he just knew i was going to sleep with him either way
I like daylight savings. I don't care if it's 4 oclock it's not daydrinking if it's dark out
seek help.
so explain to me why i woke up in jail this morning
because you opened a jar or pickles and a bag of fritos and layed down in the middle of aisle 7 while singing 'la cucaracha'
no more ever clear
Never underestimate the healing power of vomiting and a bath.
She didn't even ask about the dinosaur pinata in my trunk. Like at this point I think these are the things she expects from me
Just heard one of my friends say, "if you're trying to take advantage of me I really dont care. I just want this beer." ..
I did nothing besides stay sober all night, I walked home to find max naked knocking cups off the counter with his cock lol
I received a letter in the mail from my ex equipped with a used condom,dirt, some hair, and a nude portrait of myself.
I saw it and almost just was like "Ice breaker: your penis is massive" but I didn't.
When you're awkward as a teenager, it never goes away. You just mask it. With makeup. And boobs.
If waking up at 6 50 pm every day and getting invited to go have sex as you wake up is what alcoholism is like I can get use to this.
He told me he was gonna go wash a trailer and somehow I ended up eating vodka fruit with children in a green bean field.
I just had all of the sex. All of it.
I am not a whore. I just wanted casual drinking, monogamous sex and occasional McDonald's runs.
Randomize
