i have a real life question, do ur boyfriends pretend to be vampires ever?
I just saw the host of Singled Out do standup. Holy shit 1995.
her facebook's as public as her vagina
She always acts like she's doing me a favor with a hand job. I've been giving myself hand jobs for almost 20 years.
the boys lacrosse roster just went up... now we can see who we had sex with
I already wrote the apology to my liver. He knows whats up
I mean besides the fact someone got stabbed, I still had a pretty good night.
Did my good deed for the day.. Helped an old guy hide his beer on the NJ transit while the ticket lady came by
Will that be creepy to wake him up at midnight with my tongue all over his body??
I vaguely remember seeing that couple making out in front of that store and i yelled "I ALSO LOVE THE ROCKY MOUNTAIN SOAP COMPANY!"
So I'll bring my machete and we can smoke your shit.
Out of context, that is a hilariously scary message.
I think after 8 tries we can say Stoli Thursdays cause too much damage.
It's the never-ending clusterfuck that is my love life
DIBS on your mom for my beer pong partner.
what could you have possibly accomplished by watching 6 hours of a mythbusters marathon
well, i added sex in a wind tunnel to my bucket list
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