you told him to eat candy out of your ear instead of your vagina because you had your period. never. drink. AGAIN.
as i creep her facebook pics from back in the day till now, i noticed that her lazy eye has gotten better
You Were screaming "Im trying to get it in" and "stop cock blocking" while i threw you in the car
I held a cracker & gaterade down for an hour. I feel like this will be my greatest accomplishment of the day.
He threw up in a cup in the limo and when he got out the bouncer told him he couldn't bring drinks in so he gave the glass to that dumb girl we brought with us from c street.
I know, she tried to drink it
Definitely just put my car on cruise control so I could stick my head out of the sunroof while driving to taco bell.
The fact that I'm going to be living with you is starting to make me worry about my heatlh.
Ya that ship has sailed dude
And I might get them triple pierced after that
Damn, I didn't realize you'd declared war on airport metal detectors
This costume is too restrictive. The priest and I cannot get it on while I am wearing it.
Hey Kellie. Me putting. My face intebetaeen ut your boobs made my night
I'd rather be sodomized with a fullly decorated Christmas tree.
You keep talking about hotdogs and yelling "COME ON DOWN, LET ME SEE WHAT YOU'RE WEARING"
I thought one was bad but really there are two woman stupid enough to marry our brother...unreal
I got drunk and bought a house last night. Also, I threw up on Mike's lawn. I'm pretty excited about one of those two things.
Did you apologize to him for the trip to the strip club as a first date or is that something that just gets swept under the rug??
Randomize
