Cool, I just put that together. I didn't know if using a tie-died sub machinegun was too crazy
Theres this tee in the mall and it says all girls just wanna have safe sex. U make me think thats a lie
Do you think Conan would leave his wife for me?
Just saw a girl i'm pretty sure is simultaneously jailbait and a milf. I never want to leave mexico.
Reading in my econ of energy textbook about the US' largest oil spill from the 1990's.. guess i can't sell this one back either
Don't let the fact that shes seen my penis discourage you
Alright I don't know how you'll link it to me but yes I left a nearly empty 12 pack on your trunk
Me focusing on not shitting my pants is keeping me awake.
he said verbatim, he wants to "bang you hard".
Yes ma'am. At least you're a warning story I can tell to my kids in the future
This isn't a because its valentines day booty call, it's a because your cock is phenomenal booty call that happens to be on valentines day..
You keep talking about hotdogs and yelling "COME ON DOWN, LET ME SEE WHAT YOU'RE WEARING"
I can't decide if this outfit makes me look like a pirate. I also can't decide if I care if it does.
She's officially a Tinder poltergeist.
if being 21 means slamming 99 cent margaritas at 3:00 in the afternoon on a Tuesday then call me Peter Pan IM NEVER GROWING UP
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