Fake titties should be able inflate and deflate like tires. So on Saturday you can put on your Double D hooker titties or Sunday put on your size B church tits.
Oh and discovery of the day is it's the channel, not the time on your cable box. Thought it was 2:16 for 4 hours
She stopped mid-blowjob to introduce herself to us
Dangr zzzzzzzzone
All I remember was endless tequila and pulling karate moves from 3 Ninjas Kick Back towards the guy at 7 Eleven. Explanation?
Nobody is here, I still yelled for someone to make me some toast. That my dear is commitment to doing nothing.
The goal for tonight is vagina. In and around. Doesn't matter who. How. Or why.
She literally just changed his birthday. Overly attached girlfriend has nothing on her.
How high is the bridge and how deep is the water and what are the chances I will get arrested
Like, I can't stand that bitch, but i genuinely hope she gets the help she needs
My boss just lit a candle and said a prayer to get laid tonight ..
I swear to god if you eat that last piece of pie while I'm gone I will never speak to you again. I'm so serious.
My mom found your leather pants in our guest room. She doesn't want to know why they are there, she just wants to know if you want them washed.
2 weeks into this dating someone with money thing and I already don't know if I can go back to the being poor life
Jack and I got in a huge fight at 6am. He fell asleep when I was giving him head so I freaked. We were both black out so I made a memo in my phone reminding me
Randomize
