Can a clitoris grow tomatoes? Its symbolic and rhetorical.
What can I say...he's packing some serious heat down there. You wouldn't expect that looking at him, huh?
I guess God knew he was going to be bald...
seriously this is one of those moments where im glad i dont really talk to or know the people i sleep with
Well said.
i just got a clause named after me in the 'alcohol and drug use' section of the handbook. this is certainly a warning sign.
Where is my rescue team. I keep hiding shit. And I'm trying to give out shots of olive oil
Legitimate concern. Who am I going to have birthday sex with?
Trial is expected to last a fucking week if I get chosen.
To be fair, you are the kind of person I want to be on the jury when I inevitably end up in front of one.
I feel like every time I get the courage to masturbate to a guy from Game of Thrones, they kill him off.
Awkward sister question: which game of thrones female left would you fuck?
I think the "tmi" ship sailed a long time ago, and it took our dignities with it..
I love how when they see that I'm upset their initial response is to offer me ecstasy
Drank your wedding present. Sorry
I wore the clothes I got arrested in last night to work today.....there is no where but up from here!
THIS FUCKNUGGET
DOES HE EVEN REALIZE HOW MANY INCREDIBLE INSULTS I'VE WASTED ON HIM
I'VE INSULTED THE EVERLOVING SHIT OUT OF HIM AND HE CAN'T EVEN APPRECIATE IT
THE HO
Thanks for duct tapping my dick to my leg while I was passed out. I could only aim straight down. I stood on your bed. Have a nice day at work!
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