Bad news is im a slut again. Good news is its with people ive been a slut with before.
man i wonder what i would be like if i had never started smoking weed
Had her hockey skates on in the house. Whole floor is ruined.
Well... first you killed the girls goldfish, then you shoved her face in your armpit, made her cry, got kicked out, ate your cigarettes, and passed out in her driveway. Pretty successful night if you ask me
I'm eating crumbled blue cheese out of Tubbaware. My life is nothing.
I can feel my moral fiber fraying.
bad night - i tried for naughty librarian but could only manage to pull off pissed off barrista.
I told you, we're just gonna get ripped and light sparklers
There is a really great story behind the missing Coco Puffs and vodka mystery
Get the cougar, get the cougar, get the cougar. Act like an injured baby deer. She will either eat you alive or nurse you back to health either way its still sex.
This gem of a conversation has been brought to you be weed
classified somewhere between kinky and medically inadvisable
Trying to put a fitted sheet on drunk is one of the boss levels of slutty adulthood.
I'm in my math teacher's garage hiding right now because I fucked his son last night. It's fine
Guy just walked in with a 40 and a Honda steering wheel. Where the fuck am I?
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