how do you spell 'special'? like slow?
S P E L L C H E C K
No you dumbass thats not right
just so you know, the uglier twin gives better bjs..don't be deceived
like literally i think i'm sweating out semen right now
he drank a monster margarita at dinner. had to ask me if it was dollars or minutes that ended in 60.
The dog just did a longer kegstand than anyone at the party
Help. All alone. Room is. Changing colors. Dance party 2010, but without dancing.
What was the name of the cook I had sex with at Famous Dave's?
I think I'm going to postpone my photo shoot until my Gpa dies. I don't want to be in lingerie and stripper heels when I finally get the call
You need a twittervention. You're better than this.
I met her at the quidditch match. She was the snitch and I caught her. After at the bar she walked up grabbed my hand and said snitches have flesh memories.
"Nobody needs to know that I have a vibrating butt plug and nobody needs to know that I'm probably gonna start wearing it at work"
As a friend tho, you have the biggest dick I've ever seen
What. The. Fuck.
You'll have to be more specific. I do a lot of "what the fuck" kind of stuff
I had just gotten to his place and was about to get some dick. No way was I gonna let her negative attitude affect my orgasm feng shui
I'm eating Arby's in the bathtub because I'm an adult and I do what I want
Randomize
