she didnt even puke last nite, shes finally hit champion status. i think im in love
I think I died a long time ago.
the recession has oofficially hit my standards.
i wore my purity necklace wen we fucked. but its ok cuz simplified was blasting in the background
hahahaha. im glad listening to simplified justifies breaking ur promise to god
It was the single greastest thing to happen to my dick ever
due to concerns over safety, the theme of the 'naked fondue party' has now been changed to the 'naked fondue party with optional apron' please b.y.o.apron. extra prizes for most creative apron.
On second thought, trying to signify she was a butter face by wiping my bagel on her cheek may not have been in my best of interests
What shirt can I wear out that says 'I may have a broken arm, but it's not the one I give handjobs with'?
I've decided I want to blow you wearing a santa hat.
Aren't rabbit ears more seasonally appropriate?
It's take your daughter to work day... I really shouldn't be here right now
Reading an example in the GRE study book referencing Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles while wearing TMNT pajamas. *airfist*
omg please tell me you're eating pizza right now too.
Had sex in a blanket fort. How was your weekend?
DO NOT TOUCH THE SOAP ITS HAD SOME UNORTHODOX USES WITHIN THE PAST 15 HOURS
So I realize somewhere between mildly irritated and outright belligerently pissed is where you are, but as to location, where are you?
Guess who cheated on their SATs? Also on the same line guess who's getting in to Princeton at damn near free of charge?
Randomize