Are you with Adam and his vodka?
Yeswdsssss I masde his pickle gi away ans he go anbnoued
I found out that all you need to write a 12 page paper is adderall and twizzlers
my little brother just told me that I should start chasing my vodka with slim fast. genious.
ah, there's nothing like waking up to picture messages of a strange man's cock. life is good.
haha, that's fucked up. flacid cock pictures are the mental breakfast of champions.
True. She actually gives a fuck. A quality looked down upon if she wants to be one of us
Just got cockblocked by coyotes. This would happen to me.
This guy kept running around with a blender giving people shots of everclear and vodka. Best. Toga. Party. Ever.
shes trying to book us all flights to Ireland..I let her get mine and yours but stopped her when she tried booking the guy next to her at the library
Really, thanks for buying me caribou, it helped me out. Today will forever be the day I threw up in a caribou cup in the skyway outside of chipotle.
Im the macgyver of cooling down beers. The toilet tank was blocked so I couldn't use it.....
How did "just two beers for happy hour" turn into naked backyard wrestling?
I told her my hands were paint brushes and her vagina was my canvas
I'm getting better, this year I only showed up drunk to 1 final.
I just puke and rallied at my anniversary dinner #winning
Also so weird my phone cracked after I repeatedly threw it at the ground as hard as possible
Randomize