his cum shot went directly into his bellybutton. felt like i was playin ski ball
Watching intervention at a bar. Who let this happen??
She was raised with a wonderful home life. I can't do anything with that.
We should never set our expectations higher than pizza bagels cause then our night is bound to get better
you don't understand, he speaks spanish and is tall. i have to do him.
im seconds away from chugging that vodka and preforming the surgery on myself.
He fell off a seesaw, tore half his ear off and somehow convinced the paramedic he was allowed to have a beer while being treated
"Grocery shopping" is really just a euphemism for spending $20 on enough frozen food to last 2 weeks and spending the rest of your viable paycheck on alcohol.
Fell twice in five points. on my face. literally during a cross walk. The cars just went around me. 21st birthday memories right there
I got my dick out in a gay bar for just one free shot. I didn't know I could be bought so cheap
Have you considered sword swallowing? Something about that bj tells me you could make a it a career.
I feel bad for her. If you sacrifice and have a chubby husband I feel that you assume he's not going to cheat on you....
1 why did you tell them where i peed last night and 2 where the fuck are you
How... how did you get Adam Lambert's shoes? Does he know you have them? DID YOU STEAL ADAM LAMBERT'S SHOES?! Oh my God I am so turned on right now.
I apparently sent an offer letter to, and then subsequently onboarded, the wrong candidate. How's your Monday?
Randomize
