so he came in my eye... should i throw out my contacts?
Walk of Shame. In a state park.
we lost you for like an hour and then found you at some dive bar trying to teach dance lessons
listening to the two girls in the next stall finish a 40 and laugh at this guy they both fucked. they're calling him 'tulip dick'.
Dreamed I made out with a stranger after falling out of a car, let's make this happen tonight.
Well, I had a dudes gf walk in on us the next morning but nothing during...She shook my hand after I got dressed and said "nice to meet you with your clothes on" best moment of my life.
Exactly, there's no such thing as commitment at foam n' glow
Embrace your curves. Cuz we're too poor for a coke habit.
You tried to pay for our cab with the 2 dollars you got from selling your natty ice outside the strip club.
after giving head I just always feel like I need like. ice cream. as both a means of getting the lingering sperm out of my mouth, and a congratulations.
Seriously? You DON'T remember putting all those Swedish fish in the waffle iron b/c you wanted "One big Swedish fish?" That waffle iron was a wedding gift.
So his shoes are still here. And there are three contacts in a case. And a shirt on the bed. I've checked my dorm and he's not here. I'm so confused.
Yep, that just happened. My mom just gave me a big bag of drugs for my birthday. She even put them in a fancy bag with tissue paper.
The sex was so good I feel like I could run a triathlon, hit big at the casino, and defeat ISIS.
It's routine now. He comes home from work and i ride him like a cowgirl with only a few sips of wine. I love being his neighbor.
Randomize