My toast was "here's to being positive, and testing negative... Cheers!"... after that chick gagged on her shot, everyone knew.... slut.
dude i dont realllllly have to fuck her do i? its just a mess down there and i think im gonna cry
Puked on a Tom Jones impersonator on the strip
I'm drunk in class and I'm pretty sure the bible freak behind me is saying a prayer for me
My glasses are somewhere in your living room. Also, my underwear might be in your bathroom or on or around your porch. Sorry.
He kept his baseball cap on when he went down on me...
I am getting drunk. And i'm going to paint my face and slide down the stairs like Pochahontas. Goodbye
Remember that time we became friends because I shotgunned a Tall Boy in your bathroom?
Those memories are both hazy and awesome.
We are going to need a water proof camera with a flash....exit routes....lots of booze.....and a tutu for good measure
I just laughed at the word pudding. I have no idea whats going on right now.
he's a firefighter. like being a firefighter screams MY DICK IS HUGE SO I'M NOT AFRAID TO DIE IN THIS FIRE.
He said he looked out his window and I was sitting in the grass with blood everywhere talking to a dog.
Our conversation concluded a weekly schedule of casual sex in between classes.
I think I just got drunk texted by my psychiatrist
Sadly my Summer of Cocks is coming to an end
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