I just woke up and realized I puked in my boxers WTF.
You stay classy.
The worst part was I forgot until I tried to put them on.
You know how I know he's a virgin? He's wearing transition lenses.
I bet her clit looks like pig in a blanket.
so I have this game called 14 beers left. and we both have to drink 7 before we leave
I wish there was some sort of "recently added" function for blackberrys so i could see what random numbers i got from the night before
Google Chrome's "top 8 most visited sites" page has become my motivation to stop masturbating
i need to know the scientific term for a guy's taint so i can explain what i did last night.
It was like she tried to cover up all the weight she gained with a fake tan...
He's only a freshman and he needs to expirence shit like that..
YOU would be the Freshman Expirence
You better wipe the dick of your lips before you come smoke this blunt.
oh come on since when have relationships been boundary lines for us
fair point
I'm gonna take a crap in the portashitter like a civilized human being.
For what it's worth, I didn't think that hitting you with a crowbar as hard as I did would break your arm like that. You should drink more milk.
You wanna come over?
Too high to be booty called. My cereal is growing hair.
he said he couldn't believe he just lost his virginity and passed out. what have i done
Randomize
