We'll cross that bridge when we come to it... Or burn it. Either way we'll deal with it later
do you remember waking up from your blackout, kissing me ever so softly on the stomach, and saying "i love you bro. so much," then passing back out?
The first song on his sex mix was "highway to the danger zone"
You seemed more interested in the queso dip than you were in the hand job
I don't care what anyone says I want strippers at my funeral.
Dude. Some drunk chick just put an Aussie hat on me and was screaming at me in German. Her friends had to drag her away. Point being, I now have a cool hat.
I feel like passing out with my foot on your face has bonded us at a very fundamental level.
Just got biofeeze on my vag. Weirdest sensation everrr. Can't decide if I want to cum or cry
while i am personally glad that we met...i feel like for society as a whole it was a bad thing
i hate going to her parties because i always know everyone there which means everyone knows my ex which means i wont get laid
This guy on the tube is sooooooo high. Eyes are bloodshot and he's licking his headphone cords.
Why do I feel like I need to drink to feel better about the things I do when I'm drunk
I walked in and saw her crying and singing to her dog
Well, I was giving him a handy and I sighed in boredom. He heard. I had to fake moaning sounds after he asked if I sighed.
first he passed out on the toilet...then hugged it and screamed no no no as i tried to pull him out
Randomize
