If that ambulance is off to save our dignity, please tell them it's too late...
I'm not ready for the Pike bikes to move back in to town it was wonderful seeing that sorority house empty all summer
... I'm KD
Its like I was sleeping with a kid. His gum fell into my hair while sleeping and he just wanted to cuddle.
Just wandered into a surprise final. Only a surprise for me though. I wish I could say this is the first time this has happened.
the only good thing about these hospital visits are the free pregnancy tests
You yelled "sharpie war!" then jammed it in her ear
does she really think making her boyfriend delete me on facebook is going to magically stop us from hooking up?
I honestly don't know if ill make it through the next two hours. The hangover is strong with this one.
They wouldn't serve more then two Shots per person, so you grabbed a group of strangers and said u werre buying them all shots, then proceeded to drink all of them.
I just used my AAA membership to fix a strippers flat tire in return for a lapdance...does that make me a bad person?
I just used a thesaurus to write a sext...
When your grandma invites you to a sweet girls' Valentine's dinner with your mom and sister, but you have to decline because you're trying to get two dudes to rail you at once...
I volunteer to be the person who breaks into the room and runs around naked and has to be escorted out by police.
Saw throw up in the parking lot at work, glad I'm not the only one. But now the search begins.
Mary's wearing shades at her desk, brilliant!
I'll text you when I have a mental breakdown about it.
Please do.
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