she told me she was pregnant in a never have i ever game
I just want a better ending for myself. Not walking around with one sock on and my bush hanging out.
I saw you try to drink out of a soda machine at taco bell, don't worry about judging
They ran out of vodka so we started doing Body Doritos.
I want a picture of impoverished children wearing Oregon national champions shirts.
Yes, I feel sorry for the tribe that gets those. They won't be able to hide from the lions.
just an fyi, false alarm on the whole ghonnorea thing. you're safe.
We're going to catch a squirrel this summer
Im about to get a baby alligator stoned, what are you doing with your life?
This isn't a because its valentines day booty call, it's a because your cock is phenomenal booty call that happens to be on valentines day..
The "don't have sex with him again" alerts you set on my phone just started going off.
Good. "Seriously, don't do it" should start in about five minutes.
Dilemas of the modern woman: deciding whether or not to write on your ex's wall for his birthday. This is serious.
We need to make tonight low-budget
Is this your way of suggesting flasks?
I have a 8 minute video of a fish tank on my phone.
We need to stop going to pet stores high.
Um I got a ride home from the bar with two random boys and one tried to bang me on my parents riding mower
It was weird, it was like my heart got a boner. Is this being an adult?
Randomize
