I gotta feeling the economic climate has killed the housewife market
she uses ice cubes and hums anything I want. Last night was Welcome to the jungle. it wasnt lost on me shes a puma. no shame in that 30+ game.
I really need to stop carrying a flask around with me in my backpack at school..
Aren't you in 8th grade?
9th, but that's not the point.
no memory loss, but i'm unhappy with my memories
I woke up to him eating cereal out of my viking helmet with a shot glass. No idea where he got the milk.
I don't know. I guess at the end of the day I wanted taco bell more than a boyfriend.
Totally get that.
That would explain his violent outburst while watching barefoot contessa...
I have bruises on my ass from her spurs. God bless Texas.
Who is this?
You offered to lift up your dress at the bar so I could see your lower back tattoo
Um, I think that was a general offer to everyone. So...who IS this?
I think i smell like relationship. That's my problem.
THE MIME IS MIMING TO BUST A MOVE KARAOKE. ALL MIME-RELATED EVENTS DESERVE CAPS LOCK
Needs to be more caveman. "Me kill roommate. You watch. Then sex time with our genitals."
It's meant to be, Cynthia. You, him, and your developed breasts are meant for each other.
I was in a competition with shots tonight...shots won.
I don’t know what he is but he sure can suck a lollipop.
Randomize
