that was a gay-test. you passed.
with flying rainbow colors i hope!
Turns out you're obligated under man law to share any passwords you may have for porno sites
Is that what they're teaching u at that bar review class?
I was excited because I thought I didn't have to tell you about the crabs, but surprise! You got em!
I think the neighbors upstairs are trying for more kids. I want to run up there and yell "mazal tov!"
he actually managed to pick a girl up by telling her that her skirt was ugly and she didnt do a good job with her makeup. thats some seriously low selfesteem
YOU COME FROM SAD WHALE FAMILY, DEEP IN OCEAN!
$645 later, she's throwing up in my washroom and asking for a cab. Hooker are soooo much cheaper.
I just heard a 350 lb guy with a stutter describe getting blood in his eye as he was shanking his cellmate and, more generally, how to survive as a white guy in jail.\n\nYou should really consider going to some AA meetings
When I said I wanted you to make noise during sex, I didn't mean mocking ones.
Getting robbed by hookers is def a right of passage in a mans life
Apparently he got pepper spray on his dick. So he's a literal fire crotch.
My roommate told me he found me naked in the shower puking and when he asked why I was naked I said "you can't wear clothes in a shower"
Just walked outside my house; realized I wasn't wearing any pants after about 3 minutes or so.
Drunk, high, hungover?
...I wish I had an excuse.
Decisions were made. The quality of them will be judged tomorrow
Just got your voicemail. The 3am call wasn't a drunk dial, it was an I left my phone in my pocket then has wild animalistic sex dial...
I hate you.
You LOVE me.
Randomize
