I'm thinking we should try to start remembering stuff we do. Althought I kinda like feeling like Nancy Drew the next morning.
More like the Hardy Boys cause its kinda like a team effort.
Note to self: don't jizz on a surface cleaned with Tilex. It WILL turn purple.
Would it be a dick move to report the suite next-door for a noise violation? They're singing Bad Romance off-key and I'm not sure if I can allow that.
they were fucking between cars in the parking lot and everyone was cheering at them.
I'll be accepting presents in the forms of drinks, drugs, and orgasms. So any or all of those will be fine.
Wanna go watch Transformers and scream "AMERICA!"? I need a no thought activity
he called us the olsen twins. we also rapped ignition much to his dismay.
I didn't ride the struggle bus so much as drive it backwards off a cliff.
Come part with me. By you sleep! No fun. Idek feelings Sorry for your life.
Want to know what makes for a better story than treehouse sex? Getting busted during treehouse sex
You flew out of the bedroom, stole two Solo cups from the beer pong table, put them on your feet, clicked your heels together three times
I think we need a list of things that are automatic NO's for dating a guy. Married, definitely a no now
you just missed a great speech in which i almost coined the term "ass-ian" as in "my vaginal and ass-ian regions are no longer safe"
God please dont post that to facebook.
Serious question: is he hot or is my vagina just that barren?
I walked in the kitchen and heard her saying "We could have been so good together" as she caressed an egg with her cheek.
Randomize
