...., I just tried brushing my hair wothh a toothbrushg. fail
ps not my toothbrush awkward.
I'm in that akward stage between jailbait and cougar
Poopin on the sidewaaalllkkk. I wish my text told you that was a song
My RA just gave me tips on how to have discreet shower sex. Were we that loud?
The forest. Magic mushrooms. Wind trees leaves sky. That is alll.
In my drunkeness I was planning how to throw up without my parents hearing. I was gonna go for a "run" and just throw up outside.
Gonna send a picture of my negative pregnancy test with the message "Merry Christmas" to the guys I've been sleeping with. That alone, will put a huge dent in my shopping list of gifts for people.
donating our bodies to science does not justify what were doing to them.
I didn't ask for a picture of your soft dick.
Think of it this way, instead of a puppy, we're getting a baby.
I thought my ass was sore from the gym then I realized it was from being spanked. Confusing time in my life.
You let someone poor beer into my mouth off of a balcony. Best friend test failed.
Haahahahahahhaaa
I wish there was a tumbleweed emoji. Because that would describe my vagina.
I went with vodka instead of tequila tonight so I make better decisions. Fool proof plan.
The same idiot-bubble, now just bigger and louder.
Randomize
