i told my grandma i broke up with my boyfriend. her reply " you need to play the field more anyway"
I least I know I can't get pregnant because it's on my hair
I know i'm drunk when the "men" sign on the bathroom sounds chinese
She said "I only hook up with guys I'm dating"
So... What happend then?
We dated for an hour, i broke up with her after. BOOM.
She passed out on top of the bar. Still did body shots off her.
This is ridiculous. It's like playing possible STD Clue, and I don't want to be the winner.
If i theoretically had to put an iv back in what do I need to do?
He just turned 21, it's very obvious the end of their relationship is near. Now we play the waiting game.
The good thing about having holes in your nose from all the drugs you do is that you can't smell nasty things. Like puke.
I can't believe he let me cut his hair as stoned as I was.. I think I even cut my own hair too
I am trying to take a picture of a man in a wheelchair trying to ship a michael jackson portrait
There's no way I'm ready for marriage. I have too many pics of other guys' junk on my phone for an eternal commitment right now.
Let's get the cat blown out
Thirty seconds is a long time in jizz time...
why is there a porcupine in the kitchen
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