forecast for tonight- shitshow with a chance of tbell
my version of bright and sunny.
and when he finished he started shouting "swim boys SWIM"
Took his v-card last night. Yet another experience I didn't expect to have in my thirties.
Just had a thought: were the sirens on when we were in the ambulance?
The fact that both my ribs are severely bruised from shoving flasks in my bra might be a validation of my mothers alcoholic accusation
i'm not sure when i reached "slam my own hand in the door" status but my half attached fingernail is not grateful.
I spent the whole weekend building houses out of popsicle sticks for my bowls. How was your weekend?
They took my balls.
Tell them to carpool to pride, have a 3way, and if one says 'no thanks' just tell em it's not gay if it happened in a 3way!
We were still up at 6am, taking shots, because thats apparently how he liked to "get the day started".
Your dog took my vibrator out to the yard
Dude the little bong I just got fits nicely in the cup holder in my car. The gods approve of my habits.
It got weird the panthers lost and we started throwing wings at one another
woke up on my floor using my jeans i wore out as a pillow
haha i wouldn't expect any less of you
I'm too depressed to drink my wine. That is what I would call a serious problem
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