Do you realize we just stole 12 dollars worth of quarters each from the office petty cash just to get manicures? New high or New Low?
I finally had sex with him last night, but we used a condom so it doesn't add to my number of sexual partners.
shit I'm tired of wearing other peoples clothes to bed
So tasty. Tasty like a vagina with ninjas in it
She's the only person who can pull off turning an outdoor patio heater tower into a stripper pole.
well what is some mechanical horse racing with out blow involved
I have glow sticks stuck to my boobs and a missed call from the 911. I'd say last night was a success.
I am now best friends with a lesbian named Zulu. I am pretty hammered already and made a game time decision to stay here another night,for partying purposes
We see some guy emerge from the forest on the island this morning, alone, in only a snuggie. Morning shots and bagels on us for the number one walk of shame.
Out of all the people in the house to show their tits at mcdonalds to try and get free food, they picked those two?
Bad things happen to those who bang their lab partner at the beginning of the semester.
i'm sad to say... seems like women around here set up their armageddon booty calls ahead of time. wanna fill all these condoms with tequila and head downtown???
I don't know. Sometimes you can be a wild card with your emotions. Mostly the emotion known as anger.
im too broke to be in a relationship this close to the holidays
Starting to realize that fucking everyone I come across isn't the most... "adult"... coping method.
Randomize
