I ahte it when I peed a little on my shews. I got a litll bit on the automen in your room too.:/
Tracy!! I don't have an ottoman in my room.
Ohhh....do you have a dog shaped liek un automan?
THE PICTURE OF PEPPERMINT MOCHA MADE ME WANT TO TOUCH MYSELF
I wish the holidays was like a drive thru. Get in. Get your presents. Get out.
We got them high and they had an hour long debate on the best way to get cum out of eyes.
you better fuck at least one or both of them.
I think im definitely allergic to shell fish. Or hungover. Probably both.
So aparently telling your roommate you're going to spoon them so hard in the public place of their employment is inappropriate
Most of the bar is playing trivia I'm playing destroy a relationship in twenty questions
Hi future me, I saved you a big mac under the bed.
am i gonna have visuals on this?
you are gonna see the trees puking up fireworks and ninja pheonixes will shit rainbows and fire
We are going to need a water proof camera with a flash....exit routes....lots of booze.....and a tutu for good measure
You are so predictable. I am willing to bet 20$ that instead of going out you are sitting on your couch, stoned, watching Seinfield re-runs and eating cheezits.
1. they're goldfish. 2 fuck you
Batchelotette party success. I woke up on the floor in nothing but a thong, a garter and a shirt that says Just Do Me.
So dude comes out in a full body leotard and a wand and announced he's king of the gays. Chicago is a weird but fun place
So when the drug raid cops tell you, you should get out of the relationship, it probably means its time.
I have need of you to return home with haste, as I require the magical capsules you possess to relieve the posterior pain I am living. I battle this demon with stubborn grit, however I feel that defeat is on the horizon.
Randomize
