seems the shocker is way more shocking if u get the fingers wrong
i wish there was a 'silent except for booty calls' volume level on my phone
That's a really weird place to spoon. Especially if there are more accessible places to spoon. Like a bathtub.
Thats the last thing I remember and then I woke up in this Dutch kids dorm and he was taking a picture of me while I was sleeping
Do you remember that time on the drunk bus when I kept thanking the bus driver for serving our country?
I am fine. Katie thinkr i broke things pole dancing. I am coherant.
Got hereat 8. Had 6 beers 2 shots and a game of diZZY BATOS
HURRY. I NEED DRUNK. MORE DRUNK.
I cannot believe this. A potential 2016 Olympiad wants my vag. To which I respond "GO FOR THE GOLD"
you have to be that girl in the audience holding up the sign that says i fucked the shit out of you
I'm watching sex and the city with my wine and Wendy's. I'm not sure if this is single woman empowerment or not.
I can't imagine anything that has a removal ass flap as being sexy
Abby spilt her vodka all over the train's bathroom floor
WE'RE THE ONES DRESSED UP FOR THE LARGEST DRINKING HOLIDAY IN AMERICA WHO ELSE ON THIS TRAIN IS A SUSPECT FOR THIS SMELL?!
I really couldn't care less what she looks like. That's why The Lord Our God gave us doggy-style.
It's okay to masturbate while watching the Comey testimony right?
I hate when pretentious people talk bad ab corn dogs
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