It was like the Ritz Carlton of jails. I got introduced to our criminal system the right way.
my sombrero is too big for the bathroom
letting you know, as a good neighbor, that when your windows open and your shade is up we can hear and see you dancing naked to money maker... nice boobs
was it morally wrong to have used his girlfriends makeup after i fucked him?
Lesson learned. Whipped cream will eat through a condom.
That's what I'm here for. To bitch slap you into believing in yourself.
Only the gays. Guy gives me a handjob in the steam, then changes next to me under his towel
Only the gays
So ahh..."Multicultural Night" turned into "Fuck the Neighbor Night"
Last night was the first and hopefully last night I will ever sleep in a hotel bath tub. Sober mind you.
I'm not even gonna ask.
I have a rage boner right now. An actual erection brought on by the amount of sheer hatred I have towards nationwide.
Oh jesus...leave it to you to hit on not one but two guys who can't fuck you till marriage.
Gonna play a drinking game called drink til I feel my emotions. The things I do so I can be a therapist
This morning he fucked me while I was brushing my teeth. So I kept brushing as he thrusted. Then I brushed his teeth with my toothbrush while he was still in me. So hygienic.
its the pipe that keeps on giving. Just when I think it's done, I scrape just enough. It's a st. Patrick's day miracle!
I love you, and I just washed my hair in my work sink with handsoap.
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