If the pens lose tonight I'm gonna drive to Detroit and burn 8 mile to the ground.
Actually I may do that regardless. Probably get my own holiday.
haha i think we're both just down to be fuck buddies..but i do have a hickey and a bit of a big lip and fucking burns on my knees..note to self hooking up on a golf course is NOT that exciting
i saw a stretcher and literally ran around for 10 minutes telling people it wasnt for me
Hahaha you puked all over his shirt.
You puked in the planter and everyone saw your snatch.
Well someones bitter they didn't get any.
It never fails.. every time I have a dick in my mouth he calls me.
disregard all texts ive sent you minus taco motherfucking bell
Did I at antime last saturday slip away and sign up for a prayer circle?
Tell him I'm the girl who was excited he spoke English. Then ask him where he picked me up from.
I offered to buy ihop waffles for all the homeless people outside the metro. It was time to go to bed.
Dude he's not responding... I'll take that as an unpleasant visit to the clinic
I mean you guys are my friends and all but if you fuck with me I will not hesitate to set you on fire
I made one of my coworkers cheers to me not being pregnant. I've never talked to him before tonight. Keeping it classy.
Dad danced with a girl half his age and her boyfriend just sat at the bar and waited for dad to be done. I bought pity nachos.
He actually said the words 'I miss you' followed by 'I wanna have sex with your face'. I'd say that's a win.
I got a gay guy to motorboat me. These tits could change the world, I'm telling you.
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