you wouldn't even come home last night... Dead to me
I fucked **** last night, don't tell mike
this is mike. we're done.
i may not always bang 16 year olds but when i do, i prefer hot ones
So I got hit on by a gay guy. It might have something to do with the fact that I licked his nose.
And why did you do that?
Tequila
Just saw remains of her puke from last night on my pants.... thats got "Apology BJ" written all over it.
it always starts out as a suggestion then three hours later I have cum in my eye.
apparently breaking a beer bottle and then throwing up in a urinal is a terrible way to pick up girls.
yeah, its right past the deli mart where i showed my right tit for mozzarella sticks.
You're my spirit guide. This has to do with oatmeal cream pies.
Fuck him for salsa, please. I heard its a good recipe.
He told me that if I were a guy he'd go gay for me. Honestly don't know how to take that.
I think i'm going to homewreck at this Disney on Ice show.
Everyone here is taking crazy amounts of mescaline and I'm just over here like hey have you tried the pretzel rolls mmm
How good was the sex? She sent me a fruit basket the next day.
I think I got into an argument with my cat's former owner about what a BDSM relationship entails.
Randomize
