sometimes i wish i had a whole other life to spend on youtube
Just woke up in bed, AC on high, with a fresh pack of smokes, an unopened pint of vodka, and a bag w a beef patty w cheese in it. I think my roommate's like the toothfairy or something. Or that was way more Xanax than I needed.
Yea...but the guy who is beating me has a ponytail. So actually, I'm the winner here.
I left when they started reinacting what appeared to be a jerry springer episode
We turned everything surrounding BP and the oil leak into a "that's what she said" drinking game. We've been drunk for a month
i love you. like a brother. a brother that i had sex with more than once.
Jello bowls to the fucking face, that or ramen spiked with liq. Those are the only options in this house.
Nothing says "Good Morning" like Jell-o shots and coffee cakes.
Sorry about the whole your mom seeing my face up your ass situation
3 2 1 whiskey
I was on etsy and I'm like those boobs look way too familiar
Have you had sex with a man from New Zealand? No? Then your input is invalid.
Masterbating to Tolstoy. You?
Jesus Christ, it's not like going swimming. You don't have to wait 20 minutes after you eat to suck a dick
Well when you come back we can have a huge bitch fit...or get really drunk....whichever comes first
Randomize